All is Calm, All is Bright

UPDATE, Dec. 6....Were home! We were discharged Thursday evening the 4th. I will post more later, but please pray for Bella...she is emotionally traumatized and scared to fall asleep or go in the tub. All things she did when first coming home from Guatemala. There have been so many physical set backs for her, but we know this season will pass and God in all His glory will be revealed. She is also struggling with the new feeding tube and we were up twice last night with her throwing up. On a praise note, she is standing and walking along furniture again! Slow but sure.

It's snowing out, as it has been all week. I am on the 7th floor of the hospital with one of the greatest views in the city. I look out for miles, I can even see the hills of the lake shore coastline. Tonight, I look out the window of this hospital room and I see glittering snow falling gently on my city. Even though its 1:30 am, the city is completely lit up. I cant help but sit here and think how blessed I am to experience this sight from this room rather than my front living room window. It's peaceful, magical and hopeful.

This is the perfect end to a special evening. Bella did much better today, but she is still struggling with any medical professionals coming near her or in our room. This is something we had worked through after her first admission, but after the events of yesterdays feeding tube procedure, she has lost faith in the staff, but I have not. She will in time come to trust them, but I cant blame her one bit for the fear she is not yet able to control.

Bella is struggling with sleeping here at the hospital, she does not want to nap and she wakes up often crying. I dont think she is uncomfortable, I think she is just scared and out of sorts. Going home is going to be good for both of us. Tonight after waking for the second time at 10 pm, I decided bedtime wasn't worth fighting, I was going to make the best of it. I am so very glad I did. Bella and I spent an hour and half rolling around on the bed laughing, doing zerbet kisses, playing peekaboo, giving Molly the bear crackers and listening to her heart beat, snuggling and just being girls. It was absolutely delightful, a treasured time. Who would have thought that so many wonderful memories and bonding moments could come out of a Luekemia diagnosis. So I say again "How big is my God?"! Only He could bring joy and good out of this current "circumstance". I just love how He loves me so.

So the Princess now sleeps....all is calm on this snowy night....All is bright.